1) I would guess that your ISP is blocking port 25. This is becoming increasing common these days. If that is the case you will need to use their SMTP server instead of sending mail directly. This is a setting in the server-manager.
There is a entry in the server-manager to view mail logs, if you haven't already used it you should check it out. It is highly informative.
2) Don't worry about the "extra" settings, they are not used when you don't have the server set in that mode. If they really bother you go through and set the server back to the old mode, blank out the entries, go all the way through to the end, then re-run the configuration and set it back to standard. Alternatively you can manually edit the configuration files to remove the entries but I wouldn't recommend this, it's error prone.
Good luck,
Jim