Having used TightVNC and pcAnywhere on exactly the same hardware with broadband connections at both ends, I can tell you that (sad to say) pcAnywhere's performance is superior. And if you use its built-in encryption and choose strong passwords, I'd say its security is about as good as you're going to get. As for portforwarding being less secure than PPTP, consider that with portforwarding any hypothetical attacker is not attacking your server, just a workstation.
Which brings up another recommendation I've heard here & there ... if you're not hosting any webpages on your SME box, forward port 80 to a nonexistent local IP ... bye bye packets!