I understand that there is a few arguments for the gateway solution:
1. Built in dynamic dns client, if this function is needed.
2. Bether spam filtering.
3. Possibly bether/easier VPN connection (??).
On the other hand, what is concidered to be easy and what is complicated migt be a bit individual for each user.
I would personally say that the nat forwarding function of a standard nat router often makes everything easier, because it gives a presice, easy and clear picture of how the data flow are alloved to enter your network.
It is true that a forwarded port via a standard nat router has no security at all, from a firewalling point of wiew. On the other hand, there is nothing that prevent you from applying those filtering rules that you might wish on the open ports of the server only, if you apply an iptables script on the server only installation, behind the standard nat router, so that you get a double firewalling setup.
If the standard nat router just do forwarding, then you could quite easily set up your server only to do aditional filtering like preventing dos atacks, using rate and burst filtering, on the input chain, etc
On the other hand, it might be only a question of making things safe enough.
My SME servers has generally runned for years, without a problems, exept when I have been to clever with my modifications. Most of them have been a server only installation with an aditional firewall script, so there have been a double firewall setup. I guess that a server-gateway setup also normally would run for years without problems, so there is just two quite good alternatives.
From a very theoretical point of wiev I think that a doble firewall setup with firewalling via the nat router and aditional firewalling on the server-only installation, that also include the open ports, can make the whole installation "more safe". On the other hand, for the real world both installations might be just safe enough.
If you like to have the full control where each packet go, how many packets that are alloved to arrive, from where, to where etc, this full control can be obtained by using a standard nat router with forwarding, pluss a rather easy firewall script on the sme server-only installation.