Reporting bugs is a tedious, thankless and frustrating process. Is it any mystery to anyone why users try to avoid it?
I have reported bugs only to have them rejected or doubted or simply ignored. Only once do I recall a bug I filed getting addressed and I believe the issue is still open (I could be wrong) where it had to do with creating users in SME8 which resulted in some in-depth and detailed work with LDAP. (Not that I understand it)
On top of that, people who are in the process of actually doing the magic behind the curtains are often "short" or impatient in a variety of ways with users. This adds to the negative experiences of users... even those with a least a little technical inclination.
When the original poster made his request, he isn't yet even SURE that what he is experiencing is a bug! He believes he may be doing something wrong and would like to be corrected in the event there is a mistake on his part. If he gets confirmation that he is not doing anything wrong and that it "should work" then he has a comfortable basis for filing a bug report. If this user were to do exactly as you say, he faces a strong possibility that after all the trouble and detail of filing a good bug report that it will be rejected without much review (as is often the case) and still have no idea what was wrong or what he might have done wrong to cause the problem in the first place.
It is simply unreasonable to expect people to torture themselves needlessly in this way.
And to sum100:
Before posting your question, it is always recommended to scan the forums here for similar topics and discussions to see if others have had a similar experience. Similarly, scan the bug database for similar problems as they may have hints about resolutions and work-arounds for any problem you may be experiencing.
And take heart -- some of the most skilled developers have "weak people skills" and/or may come across as abrasive -- you shouldn't let it get to you personally. We need to hear about your issues and ESPECIALLY if you are able to resolve them. It is valuable data for the project. I might suggest you try to duplicate your attempts against a different SMTP server to see if the problem is with this "exim" server or with others as well. Determining the scope of the problem helps a great deal when trying to track down the source of a problem.