NoTo et al
SME8 doesn't have all I want, and it looks like it will be some years before it does or the contribs for the missing bits to be "friendly enough".
Firstly maybe you are still learning about SME server, so more knowledge/experience is needed.
It could also be a case of you want everything (now), but this is a free open source code world, & things happen as & when people contribute their time & effort.
Everything is not perfect, most things are in a constant state or flux of development & redevelopment & improvement etc. Things are better than they used to be some years ago.
If something is not right, then get in & fix it, do it yourself or pay someone to do it for you.
If you have a specific requirement that is important to you or urgently required for your business/personal interests, then sponsor a developer (with cash) to implement it. We all then benefit from your investment, many parts of sme server have been implemented due to corporate sponsorship.
SME server is (in my opinion) the best free all round server alternative, so learn to live with it's limitations, for there is nothing out there that is any better or has any better answers for many & varied user issues.
So Neth has all I want, but will be some years before it is documented enough for "ordinary users".
I think it is one of those situations where both distros would ABSOLUTELY benefit from the other in a joint effort.
Graham (who like both, but can't do it with either) 
Neth proposed themselves to sme server users late in 2012 (I think), a merger was an obvious outcome, a commercial entity & a community combining.
It seemed though, that Neth had their own strong mindset about how the project would advance & be implemented, whereas the contribs org community & current & past developers saw it a bit differently. I guess one of the sticking points was the use of php based code vs perl based code.
So this in part, inspired the community to reform (or perhaps improve their formation & motivation), thus spawning the koozali name & entity etc.
Here we are today, with sme9 nearly ready to go.
As I see it, perhaps if Neth had been more open to ideas or input from the community, & more proactive/interactive about it, then maybe the community may have joined up with them as corporate sponsors, but that did not happen. The community has decided to go it alone with developing sme9 based on CentOS 6, & modelled on/copied from the existing sme8 code.
The long term survival of both Neth & SME/Koozali is yet to be seen, but it seems there is willingness on both sides & there are dedicated people behind both.
Ultimately it's an end users choice what server platform to use, the people will decide whether one or both remain viable.
SME has a proven track record, but much of it's success lies in the hands of a few people, without those people it may have faltered & failed, but others have come on the scene to take over the reigns from time to time, just when it seemed that all was not well. Such is human nature to kick in & get inspired when the going gets tough. During those seemingly low times, senior developers were still developing & fixing code, despite politics within the community & opinions of doomsayers, suggesting the end of SME server.
I personally have confidence that SME/Koozali server will continue for years to come, it's simply too good doing what it does & beats all the rest for the combination of simplicity, security & functionality. Updating the look & feel will happen when people have the time (or cash) to do it. For now the safe & secure approach has been taken, after all the server will still function despite it's "appearance".